The Book of Refreshments

Q: What is this?

A: This is the "FAQ" for the Book of Refreshments Website

Q: What is the Book of Refreshments?

A: It's a sort of sacred book, sort of, and it's about refreshments, sort of.

Q: Where did this all come from?

A: The Great Powers, I suspect.

It all started with this dream I had some time ago. I was driving something that looked like a flatbed railcar through a small midwestern town at night, while holding an ordinary kitchen spatula with a six foot handle. Then the Sufi traffic cop at the main intersection told me that I should be careful with the spatula since the spirit of any stoves it was used on could be possessing it. I thought about it for a moment and told him that I was pretty safe since the only stove it had ever come into contact with - a goldenrod colored electric range - had died long ago, and had always been quite friendly.

How that dream relates to the Book of Refreshments is still unclear to me - I think it has something to do with the spatula - but that's definately where it all started.

Q: Where are all the missing chapters and verses?

A: Who can know the will of the Great Powers. I'll write them down as soon as they are revealed to me.

Q: Is this some kind of joke?

A: I can say without a doubt that to the best of my knowledge the Book of Refreshments is the absolute TRUTH.

Q: Are you on drugs?

A: Nope. I don't do drugs, and I rarely drink. Besides, you really don't want to see the sort of thing I'd write when stoned. Trust me.

Q: What, are you nuts?

A: Quite probably.

Q: Have you always been this way?

A: Actually, yes.

Q: How can I get more of this stuff?

A: And you think I'm strange? Ok, just send email to wisdom@bookofrefreshments.com and you'll get a personal reply from the Great Powers containing Wisdom from the Book of Refreshments.

Q: Is there a way I can consult The Great Powers directly to get answers to my most pressing problems?

A: Certainly! Just meditate upon your problems for a minute or so and then follow this link.